As I suspect many readers have gathered by now, I dipped a toe back into “the socials” last week.
Most notably, I reactivated the Facebook account that I deactivated for a variety of reasons back in the spring of 2021.
I remember feeling at the time about Facebook much the wayI felt about Scotch and vodka before I quit drinking (in 1987).
When someone on Facebook said, “he’s back!” I tried to brush it off, replying “I’m here. I’m not sure if I’m ‘back’ yet.”
That is clearly a distinction without a difference.
There are several reasons why I’ve crawled out of my ostrich hole:
1. Business / Advertising: Over the past year and a half, I have had some success promoting my books directly on Amazon. To expand the market,I’ve set up my own virtual bookstore so that I can offer various bundles and deals that I can’t arrange though Amazon. That done, I expect to start testing advertising on Facebook etc. in the near future. Much of that effort is also directed toward…
2. The Video Centennial: Video (the generic term for what started out as just “television”) as we know it arrived on Earth in 1927. We still have three years to mount a campaign to garner for that event the recognition that it truly deserves. I’ve got One Big Idea that is getting my deficit/disordered attention at the moment, and others ideas are percolating as well. I suspect “the socials” could have a significant role to play in those campaigns. To that end, I have also recently created…
3. The Waterstar Foundation: This is something I have pondered for decades and now it’s really happening. I have created a non-profit and obtained the 501c3 tax-exempt status from the IRS. I don’t know what role Facebook will have in that initiative; LinkedIn might prove more useful in the long run. But that, too would be part of my return to the arena.
4. I missed the memes – and sharing them with my sister.
Here are a few observations from a week of being back in the digital swamp:
What’s Different
It sure seems to me that Facebook features a lot more eye candy and click bait. I mean, what on earth are they trying to tell me here? 
Why is Facebook asking me “What’s on your mind?” – and then suggest the answer? Inspiring Stories?? Where do I even start???
I know… by scrolling into the infindibulum. I‘ll write when I find work.
There is also much more emphasis now on… well, of course…. video (please see #2 above, and, Zuck you can send your tax-deductible $1-million contribution to [link to come] – because you wouldn’t have a business without video; Facebook would be a radio call-in show.).
Now my displays are filled with short-video cliffhangers – the weird, dire, and bizarre: A truck about to roll off a cliff… a house about to fall into a raging river.. somebody on a skateboard about to wipe out a pedestrian… time-lapsed clips of insanely elaborate woodworking projects… etc. etc. Just enough footage to get me to click-click-click my one-and-only life away.
In the couple of days before I posted this, after all the horrific flooding from Hurricane Helene, the feed has been filled with ‘Reels’ of biblical flooding. Turns out they’re from India, Pakistan… all over the world.
But… do we really need Reels and Stories? Who thought that was a good idea?
I look at this stuff, because that’s what 21st century cyborgs do. Zuckerberg damn well knows that. He’s made billions from P.T. Barnum’s adage.
What Hasn’t Changed
… is the trolling, and the impossible-to-ignore impulse to engage.
Like this colorful exchange I couldn’t resist, starting with an inane meme from somebody whose name I don’t even recognize: 
…to which I could not resist replying:
Pretty fucking clever, don’t ya think? But, of course… on it goes:
So much for civil discourse. I must remember: “what you posted there really got me to thinking ” – said bnobody, ever.
But sure. I’ll start listening to ‘patriots’ like Larry – whose name is actually Harry.
And I gotta mention this: Over this past weekend I saw a re-post that inferred that the catastrophic flooding in east Tennessee and west North Carolina was caused by the “elites” who possess secret weather control technology, and that Hurricane Helene was deliberately directed over “hundreds of pro-Trump counties … during the most important election of our lifetimes.”
Who believes this stuff? And more to the point, if I’m going to surrender to the Borg this way, how do I limit my exposure to people who are clearly nutz – while also making room for viable ideas or opinions that might be different from my own?
That said, I intend to make a concerted effort to avoid posting or commenting on political stuff. Wish me luck with that.
The Upside
Within hours of sticking my virtual head up, I received a message from some old, actual friends I hadn’t actually seen in at least a decade. Former neighbors, they live in another state now. Lo and behold they saw something I posted and let me know they were in the area for a few days. The next morning we went for a hike around Radnor Lake.
Radnor lake with Dianne and Michael Killen, and Sister Dorothy.
In the week since, I have had several other meaningful contacts and renewals.
So that part of the initiative may have some actual merit. However…
On the Downside
The challenge is filtering all the rest of the #NoiseNoiseNoise.
Even harder is regulating my own behavior around the endless scrolling. Despite more than three years of abstinence, I’m still “just a poke away from scrolling all day.”
And then there is the actual experience of getting back onboard. With Facebook in particular, the process has been an arcane succession of dead ends, error messages and mystery settings.
When I first ventured forth, Facebook denied access to my long-dormant account. It kept sending a verification code “to your MacBook.” Huh? I was on my MacBook. Where the hell is the code? Well, it turns out I had to be logged into Facebook in order to retrieve the code I needed to login to Facebook.
Translation: “to retrieve password, enter password.”
It took another several days to figure out how to make my posts visible to anybody other than myself. Because that’s really useful. Very social, don’t you think?
This addresses the bionic times we live in, where we are attached to these gizmos all day long but they are not yet physically plugged into our bodies. And it illustrates an hypothesis that I’ve stated many times:
The real reason for all the tension in the world is:
1. We’re expected to do everything by ourselves (from checking out groceries to paying for parking);
2. Before we can do anything by ourselves, we have to figure out how to do it – also by ourselves.
3. Once we’ve figured out how to do it, too often… it just doesn’t. fucking. work. Or it’s a scam, a fake, or a fraud.
And still we wonder why people will vote for a moron/clown like Trump. Like he could fix anything?
For the record, those observations are pure McLuhan. The medium is the message. While we’re all envy-scrolling other people’s fabulous vacations, perfect husbands/wives and children, their devoted pets and fabulous meals, the real impact of all this is far more subliminal.
But, by all means, scroll on…
Random Observations
––What actually gets any traction in these environments? In the week since I’ve rejoined the virtually living, I’ve posted a couple of cartoons and one or two relatively genuine/serious rants, but what gets the most traction is pictures of my cat. And Molly Tuttle’s hat.
––My ‘network’ is full of people I do not really know – 1,800 ‘friends’ of which maybe, what, 20% are people I actually know?
––As Buddy Mondlock wrote: “I’m the kid who always looked out the windows….” No need to look out the windows anymore. I can just scroll forever through the digital looking-glass.
––As alluded to earlier, social media can be useful for staying in touch with actual people and could, with an effort to get off the couch, contribute to a more active and diverse actual social life. But staying ‘in touch’ is filled with endless distractions, deceptions, clickbait, trolls and clown shows.
––These platforms feed on the best of human impulses –and turn them into the worst of human impulses. I mean: I posted something witty and profound five whole minutes ago. How come I don’t have any likes or comments yet??? And who are all these trolls who snuck into my world as ‘friends’?
––What is all this? Why am I still scrolling? What am I looking for hoping to find??
––The algorithm seems to know I’ve been single for a while. My “People you may know” is filled with attractive women – that I do not know. Am I supposed just randomly send them friend requests? If I click on enough of them, can I get a date? Is this better or worse than Bumble/Tinder (Binder? Tumble?). That’s a rhetorical question. Pretty girl! Squirrel!
––I guess the lesson here is that in the 21st century, our lives have to be both on-and-offline. Living a balanced, active and engaged life seems to require surrendering to the algorithm and becoming part of The Borg.
I guess it’s just coincidence that when I get my haircut I ask her to “give me The Picard.”
Postscript
That point – that life in the 21st century is bionic, both real and virtual – was driven home last Saturday night (Sept 28).
First I saw this ‘random’ post on Facebook:
Steve Allen (not to be confused with this Steve Allen) is somebody I know peripherally. I’ve seen him perform with The Long Players, our paths have crossed on occasion, we’ve spoken a time or two but he has no reason to know me as well as (I think) I know him. He’s the kind of guitar player who still feeds my septuagenerian teenage fever dreams, so it pleases me to know him even virtually.
So I see his post about putting on a Beatles show. I was reluctant to leave the house yesterday on accounta all the rain and the horror stories from other parts of the region, but ventured forth to run a couple of errands and, as long as I was out, went to the show.
And had a blast.
The ‘Beaatedudes’ at Rosies Twin Keg on Thompson Lane. How cool that you can live in a place for 25 years and still not know all the hot-spots.
I ran into several people I had not seen in ages, caught up on their travels, commiserated over recent losses, made some ‘real-time’ contact with a couple of ‘virtual’ friends and enjoyed a tasty greasy-spoon cheeseburger and fries.
And I posted a video clip to Facebook.
Now the challenge is to just comfy with a new-ish ‘online persona’… that other personality that we all have to conjure and live with now.
So yeah. I’m back.
For now, anyway.
We’ll see what the algorithm giveth and taketh away.
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Before you go, please enjoy “The Kid,” the aforementioned song by Buddy Mondlock:
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